What She Needed
by Tinykuma
Summary: Kagome has been trying to forget her first love with a perfectly boring Hojo, but it seems like fate keeps bringing her together with her lost love. When they meet again Kagome is still raw from their last break up and decides she won't fall again.
1. Chapter 1

What She Wanted

"Of course I'll be there. 7:30 right?" Kagome carefully balanced her cell between her shoulder and ear, "mmhhmm. I know. Dress sharp." She reached for a bottle of nail polish and began to paint her toe nails in quick sure strokes. "I know you do honey. Bye. I'll see you there."

Kagome snapped her phone shut, turned her attention to her nails and sighed. It wasn't that she was unhappy. She adored her boyfriend. He was sweet, attentive and caring. Everything any girl could ask for in a relationship, but perfection was boring and if there was anything she hated, it was being bored. But she couldn't complain. This was what she wanted, what she looked for in all potential boyfriends. When she found Hojo, she knew he was what she wanted. He loved her and he told her so. Often. Too often. He didn't even mind that she couldn't say it back. Like an adoring puppy, Hojo comforted Kagome and made her feel secure. He would never stray and never doubted his feelings.

Kagome knew she loved Hojo. She just didn't feel it. When she saw him her heart rate stayed the same, her eyes remained dull and a smile didn't steal across her face. Her body had always been bit slower than her mind.

Even though the earth didn't move when she saw him, Kagome was sure she loved Hojo. It was because she loved him that she was going to get off her bed and squeeze her sizable ass into a tiny black dress. She slipped off her bed and waltzed over to her vanity. Humming softly to herself, she began applying her foundation.

Two hours later Kagome found herself dressed to kill. A black satin dress wrapped her slender body in a sensual caress as her black hair cascaded around her shoulders. Ready to apply the final touch Kagome picked up her lipstick and she paused to look in her vanity mirror. A single tear slid down her cheek. Shocked Kagome lifted her red lacquered nails to her cheek. She gazed down at her wet finger in amazement.

"Not now, please not now," she whispered softly. The empty hole in her heart swelled and encompassed her as the tears continued to slide down her face. Sometimes when she was alone her memories would creep up on her and the desolation of heartbreak would destroy the defenses she had so carefully built around her heart. It took only the smallest reminder to set her off. He had always called her a vain peacock when she stopped to check herself out. She had always laughed it off, telling him she wanted to look her best for him. It was a shame her best wasn't enough. Suddenly her phone vibrated, knocking her out of her reverie.

"Hey, I'm leaving now." Kagome quickly wiped away her tears as she grabbed her bag and stood to leave.

"Kagome, I told you the party started at 7:30, it's already 7:20. There's no way you're going to make it on time."

"I know. I know. I just got distracted. Don't worry, I'll be there on time. Even if I have to break all the traffic laws to do it." Where were her keys? Damnit, she always left them in the same place. How was it that they always managed to move to a new place?

"_Kags_..." A plaintive note entered Hojos voice. That was new. He was always so forgiving.

"I'm going to make it. Just watch. Now if I'm gonna be on time I have to go now. Bye." Kagome rolled her eyes. This conversation was getting to be to long.

"I love you." Kagome paused. He always sounded so sure. There was never any doubt in his mind. It puzzled her, but it also warmed her. Hojo might not be _the one_, but he was safe and for Kagome, safe was enough.

"I know you do honey. Bye." Kagome cringed. It wasn't like her to avoid the issue. She should just say it. It shouldn't be that hard. She knew she loved him. Her head was there, maybe if she said it enough her heart would follow.

...

Kagome arrived at the gallery, a reckless grim plastered across her face. Good thing the police were a bit slow tonight. Whistling a cheery tune Kagome sauntered up to Hojo.

"Told you I'd be on time." Inordinately proud of herself Kagome stood there expectantly. Hojo just smiled indulgently and guided her to the entrance of the gallery. Kagome sighed, clearly she wasn't going to get the praise she deserved. Hojo never appreciated her talents. "So who're we seeing today anyway? Are there gonna be paintings of naked women? I love it when they try to pass nude chicks off as art."

"Kagome, this is an important client. I'm lucky I landed him. Please try to respect him. The nude female form is art. You just haven't learned to appreciate it." A smile played across Hojos lips. They had this conversation every time he took her to an art gallery.

"I always treat your clients with respect and since I'm not a lesbian you'll have to excuse my lack of appreciation for the female form. I'm a fan of the male form." Kagome grinned playfully as she her hand gave Hojos butt a quick squeeze.

"Kagome! Not here." Hojo looked around, "this is my work place." Kagome rolled her eyes.

"Don't take yourself so seriously. Oh look. Naked people."

"That's not my artist. Come this way."

Kagome pouted, Hojo never played along with her. The man needed to lighten up. She followed him into a dimly lit room filled with watercolors of sunsets. The pink, orange and purple hues blended beautifully. The paintings were breath taking.

" Hojo, I will have your babies if you buy me this painting," Kagome declared. He placed his hand on the small of her back and leaned in to brush his lips against the back of her neck. Ever so slowly his hand slid down south. A delighted smile danced across her lips, "feeling frisky are we?"

"Always. I'll buy all the artwork here for you if you'll bear my children."

Kagome froze. This was not her boyfriend.

"Miroku," growled a low feminine voice. "I thought we agreed that I'd let you back in the house if you stopped propositioning other women. Do you want to spend the rest of your life sleeping with the dogs?"

"But honey, she propositioned me," whined Miroku. The woman, apparently this mans girlfriend, glared daggers at Kagome.

"Hey, I was only propositioning my boyfriend," said Kagome as she lifted her hands in defense. Her eyes widened as the woman smacked the man upside his head. Oddly enough, the man continued to gaze at the woman with adoration.

"My love, my light, my darling. Your eyes outshine the stars and your lips put Aphrodite to shame," cooed the man. Kagome giggled softly at the spectacle before her. Miroku had sunk to his knees and held the womans hand in his.

"Is that so?," the woman asked skeptically. "And when did you see Aphrodite?"

"Every time I look at you," murmured Miroku.

"Oh really? So now I remind you of another woman?" The woman looked like she would explode in a moment. Kagome couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing.

"My god, you two are like an old married couple," laughed Kagome. The couple paused for a moment. Apparently they had forgotten all about her.

"Actually we've only been married for a seven years and I'm really quite young," chimed Miroku.

"Um, hello. I'm Sango and this is my husband Miroku. This is my collection." The woman smiled uncertainty and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Your paintings are lovely." Kagome scanned the gallery and dragged Sango over to her favorite painting. "I love this one," she gushed. "The composition is brilliant and the color choice is...amazing. It's like I'm actually there."

"Oh, my. Thank you." Sango smiled, flustered. "I'd love to talk to you more, but I've got to see to the other guests. It was a pleasure to meet you." As Sango moved away Miroku moved in.

"Look, I'm sorry about earlier. Can we start over?" Miroku grinned, "My name is Miroku and you are?"

"Kagome. Next time you should skip the compliments and just kiss her. It works better."

"I think we're going to be very good friends."

...

"No no no no no. I think the female body totally art. It's like...sublime. Like, like God made man 2.0 only he added some gear and took some away. You know what I mean?" Slurred Miroku.

"Totally. It's like, it's like a rough draft. Like man was the rough draft and then there was woman." Kagome replied, equally smashed. "Oh god. Here comes my boyfriend. Quick hide the booze." Kagome hastily shoved the bottles of champagne under the bench they were sitting on. She popped some gum in her mouth as Miroku quickly sprayed her with some smelly man deodorant in an effort to disguise the smell of alcohol.

"Does this shit actually work?" Hissed Kagome as she was assaulted by the stench of Axe.

"Of course. Sango has yet to notice."

"She probably just turns a blind eye," muttered Kagome. As Hojo neared she straightened herself and smiled.

"There you are Kagome. You still haven't seen my clients work." He reached for her hand, but Kagome stood on her own and moved away from him.

"Right, of course. Well, just point me in the direction and I'll find it." Hojo looked at her as if she had grown a tail out of her head.

"Okay. It's right over there." Hojo pointed to an entrance of another room. Kagome silently thanked god for her sober appearance and prayed she would be able to walk straight. Now she just needed to avoid saying anything that would give her away. She carefully made her way over to the new room and did her best to walk straight.

Once inside Kagome made her way over to the first piece of art she could find and as she did her breath caught in her throat. Before her hung a massive mural. Slender nymphs danced across the canvas as they frolicked in a lush forest. Bears, deer and small brown bunnies followed the nymphs in their joyful dance. Kagome sighed. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.

"Ah, yes. Not his best work. A bit out of character for him. Did it for a friends kid."

Kagomes smile faded slightly. Hojo didn't understand her. He was obliviously happy and so _bland_. They were nothing alike. Considering how hopelessly colorless he was his talent for finding the best artists around was astounding. Although his inability to appreciate the beauty of this particularly fantastic mural was beyond her.

"Kagome. I know we haven't been going out for a long time..." Hojos voice faded in to the background. Kagome frowned to herself. Hojo was what she wanted right? He was warm, caring and relatively handsome, but good god he was terrible in bed. He called to often and didn't laugh at her jokes. He was as exciting as a lump on a log. He always left the toilet seat up and he didn't hold her when they slept. He was shrimpy and spineless. Oh my god. Kagomes eyes widened.

"Will you marry me?"

"I hate you," she blurted out. It would seem alcohol acted as a veritaserum for her.

Hojo stared at Kagome stunned. "I-I thought you loved me. I know you never said it, but..."

"I'm sorry Hojo. I just...I have to go. I'm sorry." And with that Kagome fled. As she stumbled towards the exit she bumped into someone and quickly mumbled an apology.

...

Amber eyes stared in amazement as the apparition from his past stumbled past him. He opened his mouth to call her name but another man reached her before he could say anything. He frowned.

AN:

Hey guys,

For those of you that read my first story this one is going to have a different tone. It'll be a bit more dramatic. I only vaguely know where I'm going with this and it's my first chapter story so be patient with me. Please review. It gives me warm fuzzies and motivates me to write more.

Until next time,

TK


	2. Chapter 2

Kagome dug her nails into her steering wheel as she drove away. Tears streamed steadily down her face as she struggled to focus on the road before her. She pulled over to the side of the road and turned her car off. She stared blankly ahead, but her mind raced.

What she had done to Hojo was wrong. She shouldn't have left him like that with no explanation. Hell, she shouldn't have been in a relationship in the first place. She wasn't ready for the kind of commitment Hojo wanted. The kind of commitment he deserved. The man wanted to marry her and she wanted nothing more than to be in his arms. Poor fool. He had no idea how emotionally detached she had been while they had been dating, but she was being cruel. She had been played the fool before and she knew how it felt. It wasn't fair to do to him what had been done to her. She knew what it felt like to fall in love, to believe he loved you, to feel like the future was bright and to have your heart rendered from your chest. Kagome closed her eyes and after years of suppression, she let her memories engulf her.

Six years earlier

Good lord. All her friends were allergic to responsibility. Kagome sat on the stairs of Shikon High with Kikyo, her childhood friend who should've been born a blond. Kikyo had lost her tickets for the graduation and now they would have to wait until everyone had filed into stadium before they could go in. Kikyo was prattling on about her new boyfriend when a group of guys stopped in front of them.

"Hey guys," chirped Kikyo. Kagome looked up and her heart stopped. Before her stood a group of tall handsome young men. One in particular gazed at her intensely. His long silvery hair framed his face. He seemed just as surprised to see her as she felt.

"I remember your name." His deep voice brought Kagome back to reality.

"Uhm I uh remember your name too," she murmured quietly. The other guys just grinned at each other.

"We're going to go in now. Maybe we'll see you in there." As quickly as they had arrived the guys disappeared. Kagome simply stared ahead, dazed. She didn't think she'd ever see him again. She couldn't believe it. What was he doing here? He had grown up. Her heart beat increased rapidly and she swallowed nervously, wondering if he hated her for ignoring him.

That night as she lay in bed she got a text from Kikyo asking if she could give Sesshoumaru her number. Of course she said yes and less than five minutes later he called her. Before she fell asleep she had set up her first date with Sesshoumaru. The next day they would be going to lunch. When he dropped her off at home she waited for him to kiss her, but he simply hugged her.

Their second date was dinner with his friends. This time he kissed her. He had leaned in and asked her softly, "can I kiss you now?"

"Yes." Kagome could barely contain her excitement. It was her first romantic kiss. "But I've never really kissed anyone before, um I'm not really sure."

"You're so cute." Sesshoumaru cut her off and leaned it. His lips had been so soft and he had been so patient. Nervous and inexperienced Kagome had pulled back repeatedly and buried her head in his neck whenever it became to much. Ever the patient gentlemen Sesshoumaru encouraged her and guided her.

The third date. Oh, that third date. They went hiking and then he took her to lunch. They went to a park and he lay his head on her lap and slept until her fidgeting woke him up. He gazed up at her with those beautiful eyes and told her he wanted to make love to her. Of course she said yes.

They went back to his place and he was gentle, asking her if she was sure, asking her if she was enjoying it. Of course she said yes. Just like that she lost her virginity and just like that she lost her heart.

She sat by her phone. Waiting. She hadn't heard from him in days. Tapping her nails nervously on the counter she tried to pretend she wasn't worried. He could have lost his phone or her calls and texts could be lost in the numerous calls of his friends. He was very popular. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew what his silence meant. Things between them were over. A truth she could only admit in the safety of her own mind. She had trouble believing it, couldn't accept it. The last time they had seen eachother their relationship had been the best it had ever been. She had never been so comfortable with him before. She smiled as she remembered the way he had tenderly pushed her hair back kissed her forehead, how she had simply held him as he read his mail. Maybe the intimacy had scared him away. She couldn't understand it. Why hadn't he called? Why hadn't she heard anything from him? Why?

No, Kagome would not mock Hojo. She understood his pain far to well.

...

Sesshoumaru smirked as the woman before him shrugged off the man that had run after her. The dejected male turned back to the gallery and began making his way towards Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumarus eyes slid to his side to evaluate the woman beside him.

"Does it bother you that your husband just chased after another woman?" Sesshoumaru inquired.

"Not particularly," she replied unruffled.

"Is that so?" He murmured.

"Yes. He spent the night getting hammered with her, discussing the merits of nude art."

"Ah, I see. Mirokus favorite topic. So this woman is basically another Inuyasha."

"Indeed." Sango sighed. "I hope they didn't exchange numbers or anything. The last thing I need is another child to babysit."

Sesshoumaru simply smirked. His hopes were the exact opposite of Sangos. Kagome could be quite the handful, but she was no where near the level idiocy as those two. The two idiots were in a league of their own. Kagome was...different. Sincere. Playful. Subject to her emotions. It was highly entertaining.

Sango considered her friend carefully. In all their years as friends she had never seen him this alive. He hummed with energy. Well maybe not hummed, but he was as close to smiling as she had ever seen him and it was almost as if he was excited. As soon as he had laid eyes on that woman his eyes had lit up. Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad if Miroku had gotten the womans information. Babysitting wasn't all that bad. Besides it was practice for when she had kids.

"She forgot her bottle," mournfully sighed Miroku as he held up an empty Champaign bottle to Sango. "She always talked about how beautiful it was." His eyes watered up as he gave her his best imitation of a puppy. "Comfort me?"

"Comfort your husband Sango, I'm going to see if any of my collection has sold," said Sesshoumaru as he began walking away.

"Please don't desert me," she implored. "He's so drunk..."

"Not my problem," smirked Sesshoumaru as he disappeared into the building.

"She's gone and now so is he," wailed Miroku as he turned to Sango. She rolled her eyes. It's like he thinks she's dead or something. "Please allow me to rest my head upon your bosom. It would make me feel so much better."

"I'm never having kids," murmured Sango.

"You mean you won't bear my children?" Gasped a horrified Miroku and he proceeded to begin sobbing loudly.

Nevermind, Babysitting really is that bad.

...

Morning found Kagome nestled deep in the comforters of her bed. Beams of sunlight bathed Kagomes face as she slept. Her eyes were puffy and crumpled bits of tissue decorated her bed. She clung to a ragged unicorn plushie as she dozed. Her dreams had not been kind to her. A single tear slipped down her face waking her. As she returned to the world of the living the echos of her bleak dreams caused an empty feeling to settle into her heart. She lay in bed listlessly as her heart broke again. Why did she have to see him again? Why did the universe conspire against her?

A loud beeping sound knocked Kagome out of her revere. Groaning, she rolled herself out of bed. While she would love nothing more than to throw herself a pity party, ice cream and all, the world would not wait for her and if the number of messages on her cellphone were any indication the world needed her, and by world she meant her boss.

Kagome stood and stretched.

Time to man up.

...

"I always knew you'd have a melt down without me. Clearly you need me in your life and as such, I demand a raise."

"Kagome," gritted Kikyo.

"I mean if this mornings panic was any indication of how much you need me," continued a relentless Kagome, "then I am obviously your life blood. Your everything."

"Kagome."

"Obviously, you can't function without me and since I'm so vital to the operation of this company and as such I demand a raise."

"Kagome."

"Furthermore, I constantly cover for you and your torrid affair with that man despite the fact that I have never met him and-"

"Kagome, shut the fuck up," growled Kikyo.

"Did I go to far?" Kagome winced, "I'm sorry it's just I would really like to go on a vacation and I can't afford to take one unless I make more money and-"

"A vacation?" interrupted Kikyo, "after all that I ought to never let you out of my sight. After all you are my, and I quote, 'life blood.' What the hell do you need a vacation for anyway?"

Kagomes eyes darted to the door. Kikyo had known her all her life. If anyone would be able to see through Kagomes facade it would be Kikyo. Perhaps it was time for a change of subject.

"So when am I going to get to meet this man anyway? The mysterious other half of your torrid affair. It's only fair I get to meet him after covering your ass so many times. Is he good in bed?" asked Kagome. "Is it just sex or is it sex and feelings? Because sex and feelings can get messy. Especially since you guys are hiding your relationship from freaking everyone. Even me. Is he ugly or something?"

"Don't change the subject on me. Something's wrong." Kikyo fixed her eyes on Kagome. "Your eyes are puffy and you're asking for vacation. You never ask for vacation. You hate vacation. Work is your life and you look like someone just stole that stupid unicorn plushie of yours and then told you that the Christmas is a lie. What the hell happened?"

Kagome sighed softly, "I saw him again."

Kikyo's eyes widened. Shit. This was bad news bears. No wonder Kagome was asking for a vacation. If this was the him she thought it was, then it was a miracle Kagome had made it to work.

"Please," pleaded Kagome. "I need to get away."

"Go home Kagome," sighed Kikyo. Kagome smiled gratefully and began walking towards the door. "Oh and Kagome, it's sex and feelings. I'll see you next week."

...

Sango smiled to herself. Her daughter loved the latest addition to her play room. The girl couldn't stop staring at the mural and if she smiled any wider she'd split her cheeks. Sango glanced at Sesshoumaru. She laughed softly, her daughter had the poor man wrapped around her finger.

Sesshoumaru crouched down next to the little girl and inquired if she liked the mural, he had made it just for her. She squealed and threw her tiny arms around him proclaiming her love for the mural. The young girls brown eyes danced and her expressive face glowed radiantly as she gushed about the dancing bears and adorable bunnies.

Sango gazed thoughtfully at the pair. Her daughter was very similar to the young lady from the other night at the art gallery. She was expressive and open with her emotions. Every word was spoken with complete truth, every glance was completely honest, every gesture was made with passion, every idea that passed through the gates of her lips was spoken with conviction and sincerity. She was easier to read then a book. Perhaps that is why Sesshoumaru had locked on to the young woman at the gallery. That woman had been completely and utterly honest.

AN:

soooo I'm pretty sure it's been more than a year since I've updated. Sorry about that for those of you who care. I'm back now and I hope I'll be updating more often. Although at this point as long as I update within a year it's more often than I was updating before. I apologize if the chapter is all over the place. I wrote half of it last year and half of this year. Next chapter we'll hear Sesshoumaru's side of the story. Anyway, I hope you liked it and I would appreciate feed back, aka reviews.

Until next time (which will be within a year),

TK


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